lights out

Remember the 80’s? I do. Those were the days when the lights in the subway cars used to blink and flash and flat out go dark for long periods of time. During those periods of prolonged darkness were the perfect times to rob, molest, and stab people. Ah, the good old days. Of course, today we have electronic messages instructing us as to the fact that a crowded subway is in fact not a valid excuse for molesting people. But, no similar pronouncement is made for a darkened subway car. Such is the hubris of the MTA during their move towards electronifying messages and psa’s that they assumed that their subway cars would always be crowded, but not dark. But yet, here I was, stepping onto the 1 train this morning at 225^th street, only to realize that - no it wasn’t just the crust in my eyes – the reason I couldn’t read my magazine was that the lights were out!

This is not the first time in recent months (maybe last couple years, even) that I’ve been on a train with flickering lights a la the 80’s. But, I must admit that this was the first straight up light outage that I’ve sat through in recent decades. I can’t say that I was too worried for anyone in terms of getting robbed, molested, or stabbed. It seems that even with this recent economic downturn, recent cuts to service and obvious neglect by the MTA, enough people are still under the impression – falsely gotten during the 90’s and early 2000’s, that they are middle class – or that they will one day become upper class – that on a whole, New Yorkers aren’t acting up or risking their freedom to confront injustices. Still, as far as signs go, I consider light outages on subway cars to be a bad one. And by bad I mean that a day may come soon when a dark subway car will be something to avoid or if need be to come on and have need for all of your working senses. Just a prediction.

Another 80’s (and perhaps beyond) feature of subway transport, but one that is not true anymore, is the muffled sound of the train operator announcements. Of course, back then I don’t remember as many service change announcements, but it was my general rule to not even try to listen to announcements made over the loudspeaker because they sounded like they were made by a person gargling tennis balls. It was not a worthwhile use of time. This has been upgraded. Now, the speakers are used to give the bad news of the service changes – but at least the news is intelligible. Also, the speakers are used as a forum for the public to be admonished. “STEP IN AND STAND CLEAR OF THE CLOSING DOORS!” Yelled the train operator today. And I mean yelled. He used a voice that made me, for a moment, feel at fault for something even though I was sitting peacefully, trying to make out words on my magazine page in the dark.

Later in my commute, I was standing on the 3 train. I imagined a contraption whose purpose it was to persuade people not to crowd in front of the door. This would be a series of laser beams infesting the area directly in front of the doors (generally speaking, the width of the doorway, the height of the train, and the depth of the rows of seats. These lasers would activate upon the closing of the doors, and would liquefy, no, pulverize, no, disintegrate anyone who stood in that area. I understand that this would mean that the problem of crowding would simply shift inward, not disappear. But, it would at least give a better reason for crowding. As it stands, it is difficult to stomach people who’s lack of perspective on the world allows them them luxury of stepping through the threshold of the doorway and simply standing there as though no-one might come into the train after them. Then, when the next station arrives, they simply sift at a 90 degree angle so that they are standing perpendicular to the doorway, as though this makes them invisible. Seriously though – this is not a blog about complaining about people. But, it should be mentioned that in this author’s viewpoint, it is perfectly acceptable to walk through people who are standing in the doorway of a subway car. It is also acceptable to raise your elbows when people begin entering the train before you’ve exited. Other than those quibbles, I am for the people…